At the awning of Java Café, Consolata Nzomo, the FedEx regional head for Kenya and Nigeria, arrives wrapped in a yellow, booming voice with sunshine hidden in her vocal cords.
She confesses she, in the past, had been quite temperamental. She was not always this put together. Then, she moved to Machakos. She had daughters: 24 and 28 years old. She’s let many things go, polished her soul and the dust of everyday life.
“The time to live is now,” she says, “travel light.”
Soon, she says, she will be an empty nester. What will she become? She was in drama till university. She danced and sang. Now she is a pugilist; who knows what she will be tomorrow? One of her daughters is an actor whose film is set to premiere on Netflix. “She’ll kill me if I told on her,” she says when I ask about the film.
How are you raising your children differently from how you were raised? Or are they the ones raising you now?
We never spoke up. We were brought up in a way that parents were the law. I guide my daughters. The younger one did IB [International Baccalaureate] at St Mary’s, and she was always the star. I went to university and got a corporate gig, which was my life. My daughter does gigs and concerts, but I told her to get a degree just in case. She needs to be versatile.
How do you remain a girl?
Haha! I love life. I have a gratitude jar by the bedside, so every day, I have to write things I am grateful for, even if I have to squint to find the good in the day. I am alive, I am healthy. My doctor told me my liver is very clean. I stopped drinking last year. I box three times a week, at 6.30am.
What are you most grateful for?
The gift of life. For as long as I am breathing, I have a chance to change my or someone else’s life.
How did you pick up boxing?
Because I have gone to the gym all my life, aerobics and swimming. My sisters and big brother have always worked out. Every three months, I’ll go swimming or to the gym, so I don’t get bored.
Do you have an image of someone in mind when you are boxing?
Or a problem [chuckles]. I am told my right hand has a strong punch! You remove all that pent-up anger and frustration.
What’s the most boring part about boxing?
It’s not. From the beginning to the end, I did it as a self-defence mechanism. But I hope I never have to use it.
How long are your sessions?
One hour. Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Tuesday and Thursday, I walk or run. I live in Machakos, so I love walking, and I take pictures of giraffes or whichever animals I meet that day. I just hope I never run into a hyena!
On Saturdays at 6am, I join I group of people at Mua Hills who run up one hill 15 times. You run up and walk down. By 7am, we are done. I then have a book club at 7am to 8am. We are currently reading “The Gifts of Imperfection” [by Dr Brené Brown].
Have any of your children picked up this active exercise life?
My firstborn daughter is in the gym every day. She is very fit.
Without using the word “balance”, how do you keep all these plates floating in the air?
Sometimes, they drop, but you have to know when to do a stop check. It’s not always balance.
In what ways has motherhood changed you?
I was very young when I became a mother. I was in campus. It was scary, but it made me a better person.
How?
There are feelings I never thought I had, to be able to love someone unconditionally. My firstborn is 28, my second is 24. Loving them unconditionally makes you look back at the things you did to your parents, wondering if you were a good child or not.
What kind of a mother are you?
Interesting. You should ask my children. I am bringing them up to be independent, to make decisions not because someone somewhere is making them do it. I am travelling now, I wish I travelled then. I want them to travel, to make their own life.
Did you grow up in such a strong-willed home?
My dad focused on both my brothers and sisters. He supported us in whatever we needed to do. We are six. My mom has me, she says she got me... When I visit them, they pray for me and the children and bless us. They live in rural Machakos. I don’t take that for granted.
What’s a tradition you grew up in that you would like to pass on to your children?
Christmas. A time to come together with family, play with friends. I grew up acting until they made me Joseph in Standard 8. I was so annoyed [chuckles] because I am trying to be manly but I had boobs haha! I would, however, like to continue that tradition of bringing people together.
Perhaps they were preparing you for, what’s the word you used—versatility?
Haha! After talking to you, I am actually going to see what else I can do. I love empty spaces. I have an eye; I know how to put things together—colour and furniture. When people come to my house, they find that I don’t have a TV so you can talk to me; we bond and talk.
I won’t share the password to the Internet until after we have talked. Where the TV is supposed to be, I have mounted photos [chuckles].
Are you ever afraid of what comes next after the big office?
Maybe not afraid, but I just wonder. I am trying to put things in place for the continuity of life after the corporate world. Maybe I will do interior design, or mentor women, or public office.
When you broke the glass ceiling, pardon the cliché, what was that moment like for you?
I look at life differently. I don’t see ceilings; it’s just your path, my path, which is just different.
In my experience, I tend to find that female CEOs have a higher scrutiny than their male counterparts. What has been your experience?
I am going to be quite careful with how I answer that. I am in the logistics space, which is male-dominated. At a previous job, I was the only female in the leadership group.
One of the men said, get off your high heels and work. We were only two ladies in that team. I confronted him later and had the conversation: If that was your daughter and someone said that to them, how would you feel? Later, he came and apologised.
What’s a piece of advice you wish you hadn’t listened to?
If I want to get somewhere, I find a plan of how to get there, and I do it... What I am saying is, don’t let somebody tell you you can’t do something.
What do you love most about yourself?
[chuckles] My personality. I can dine with the kings, and I can still be humble. That is how my life has been.
What wouldn’t I believe about you?
That I am an introvert haha! Fridays, when I go home, I play jazz. I love being alone. I can go home on Friday and just leave on Monday—I love my company.
What matters more than you thought it would?
Love and forgiveness. As I grow, it’s never that serious. Forgive and let go of the negativity, things that don’t work, and people who don’t want you in their life. If it’s not working, let it go. Travel light.
What are you letting go of?
Haha! People that I don’t need in my journey [chuckles]. But really, unnecessary baggage—people who hurt me, people I carried along the way—every day is a new beginning. Healing and forgiveness are a journey.
What is one question you wish people asked you?
How are you? And they look you in the eye, sit, and listen. When you walk into the office, no one cares—life continues, and decisions have to be made. No one has yet to ask me, “Conso, really, how are you?” They expect me to be the umbrella.
How are you, Consolata?
Thank you for asking. For the most part, I am okay, I am walking my journey. Am I where I want to be? No, but I am on my way there.
My children are all grown, and soon I’ll be an empty nester. I have two dogs—that sounds sad, haha! It’s about me now. I am where I am supposed to be.
When you get to where you are going, where will you be?
In my casket, in the grave. Live in the moment, travel, I have gone to most of the places I have wanted to go to. I have been to Santorini, Greece and the sunset? My word. That is God’s bedroom, a place can’t be that beautiful. Live. Every day, do something. Hakuna kufika. The time for being is now. Be.
What is a question I should ask the next CEO?
Ask them who they are. Because most of us are more than one person, not what the books or what the people want to hear. Like really, “Who are you?”
